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Lessons Learned,Life

Things I’ve Learned The Hard Way

posted on : September 20, 2018 posted by : Somethingsihavelearned 0 Comment

Here is a list of some of the things I’ve learned along the way, and some of them the hard way:

1)  Yelling at someone never accomplishes anything positive, but controlling my temper does.

2)  Sometimes I do my best and it’s not good enough.  Often God will make up the difference but sometimes people need to recognize it was my best and let it go.

3)  Sometimes I’m the one who needs to recognize it was someone’s best effort and let it go.

4)  Often I want life to be easier but anything worth having takes a lot of work, and that includes raising a family.

5)  Don’t worry about the small things because they are small things.

6)  Taking the long view always pays off.

7)  When I’m feeling grumpy and snap at people it’s usually myself I’m upset with. Recognizing this allows me to take a step back and make adjustments.

8)  When I’ve mastered bad habits it’s easy to slide back if I’m not vigilant.

9)  People I love get to make their own choices and all I can do is love them, but it doesn’t mean I have to like their choices.

10)  It’s better to listen to understand others instead of telling them how they should think/act/be.

11)  Input from others is good but the bigger the group the harder it is to decide something.

12)  Fair does not mean equal-each of my children get what they need and it’s not always the same or even the same amount as another one of my children.

13)  It took me a long time to figure out but I have no control over anyone but myself and even that’s iffy sometimes.

Since I have learned these things and have applied them in my life I have been happier and life has gone better. But, and this is number fourteen-

14)  Even if I am doing my best to live a good life, being kind to others and keeping the commandments I will still have challenges and problems.  The only way to deal with life and be happy is through Jesus Christ and His grace.

 

 

Faith,Lessons Learned,Life

Sometimes I Worry

posted on : July 12, 2018 posted by : Somethingsihavelearned 2 Comments

There is a wonderful thought attributed to Mother Teresa entitled:

Do It Anyway

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered.  Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.  Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you.  Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.

The good you do today will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.

Give the best you have and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.

I love the concept of this message because sometimes I worry that in writing this blog people will think that I think I know everything, or that I think I have all of the answers or that I consider myself wise.  Sometimes I worry about what I write and if it will really help others, or worry about talking about religious stuff too much. Sometimes I worry that I am deluding myself about the efficacy of the blog and the expense and time involved are worth it.  Sometimes I wonder if this is really, in some small way, making a difference.  Maybe there are things you are wondering about in your life too.  Wondering if in the ways you are contributing to your family, neighborhood, church, employment and life is enough, if it is good and if you are making a difference in the world.  Wondering if in the small way you contribute good to those around you is enough.  Sharon Eubank in General Conference in October 2017 said “Any small thing you do to light real happiness in others shows that you are already carrying the torch…” and she went on to talk about turning on your light.  Small can be significant and good, and it is so easy to second guess ourselves and let worry or fears get in our way of doing something good, and to worry about what others think or how they will react. From these thoughts I learn to just Do It Anyway and maybe you will too.

https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2017/10/turn-on-your-light?lang=eng

Faith,Life

Waiting for Promises

posted on : June 28, 2018 posted by : Somethingsihavelearned 0 Comment

I have been fascinated with the prophet Abraham for a while.  Even in the midst of evil, and some of his family members were not doing good things, he chose to stay on the path, to be obedient and keep the commandments.  He received from Jehovah great promises, especially the promise that his seed or children would be as the sands of the sea or the stars in heaven.  In the book of Genesis it says that he was 75 years old when he first received this promise.  Since he was 100 years old when Isaac, the son of the promise, was born I have been thinking about how long he had to wait for the promise to begin to be fulfilled. Did he begin to wonder if he had heard right or misunderstood the Lord?  As he and Sarah aged, did he doubt?  Did he have great faith and never doubted but waited for the promises from Jehovah to be fulfilled? And then, he only had one child of promise, and was asked to sacrifice that child.  Abraham was an extraordinary man who was given great promises, but then I have been given great promises too, not only as his descendant but also as a daughter of God and a woman of covenants.  Sometimes, when I don’t see some of these promises happening very fast and I wonder if it’s because I’m not faithful enough, or misunderstood something or some other vague thing.  Mostly I think I just need to continue to be faithful and patient, and watch for the hand of God in my life.  Neal A. Maxwell said that when we are unduly impatient we are suggesting that we know more than God and we are questioning God’s omniscience. I try to remember this because sometimes it is hard to wait with hope when I see people who I love making wrong choices or when I am in the midst of another terrible migraine, or life isn’t going the way I think it should.  I think that part of my schooling in this life is to develop faith and patience, and to learn to trust God, and Neal A. Maxwell said that patience and faith are closely related.  Patience denotes faith and you can’t have faith without patience, they go hand-in-hand. When not yet fulfilled promises don’t seem to be even on the horizon, I am stretched and my faith and patience grows as I look to God and trust Him. Even in hard times, in the back of my mind, I know God’s promises are sure and He will always keep His promises.

Faith,Lessons Learned

Diligence

posted on : April 12, 2018 posted by : Somethingsihavelearned 0 Comment

I have a 16-year-old daughter with Down Syndrome.  She is an amazing person who was born with faith and when I tell her something, she believes me.  She loves going to church and participating in Sunday School and Young Women’s classes, and she takes seminary classes through her high school.  She always reminds me to do family scriptures and prayer and I know she reads her scriptures on her own and says her prayers each night, and she always remembers to ask for a blessing on her food- even in a restaurant.  Sometimes after she gets home from school when she’s had seminary or after a Sunday School class I will ask her what the lesson was about or something that she learned.  Her reply is always said with a little frustration “I don’t know.”  I can ask her several questions to try to prompt her memory but she genuinely doesn’t know what was talked about.  In some ways it’s even more remarkable that she persists in doing these righteous behaviors since she doesn’t remember what she’s taught or read. I have thought about her diligence in attending these classes and doing her own personal reading and remember the scripture in the Bible from John 14:26 which says in part “…the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance…”  The knowledge is in there and some day, because of her diligence, she will have all things brought to her remembrance through the Holy Ghost.

Faith,Lessons Learned

The Answers to Life’s Questions

posted on : March 19, 2018 posted by : Somethingsihavelearned 0 Comment

Any time I have had a question or a big decision to make I have found my answer by reading my scriptures. Many years ago my husband and I were trying to decide about buying a house.  It would entail taking on considerable debt, and debt scared me then and still does now, and also leaving a house we had just finished remodeling and I thought was about perfect. We had put a ton of work into the yard and it seemed a little like the garden of Eden to me.  We had managed to get the house and the yard just about perfect for us. The new house we were considering was on 4 acres of land and had a nice barn on it.  For years my husband and I had talked about finding a home on some land for us to spread out on.  He had grown up on a couple of acres of land and had great memories of building forts and climbing trees and other kinds of things kids like to do.  He wanted the same thing for our kids, and he really liked the barn.  It would give him a place to build things, something he loved doing. The house was nice and would give us extra room for our large family.  It was a hard decision to make but we decided to put an offer on the house and as usual I turned to my scriptures to receive confirmation or not as I prayed fervently.  This time though I thought “there’s no scripture that says go buy a house or don’t buy a house” so I thought my prayers would have to be answered some other way.  I continued to study my scriptures hoping that I would receive my answer by immersing myself in spiritual things.  One day as I was studying I came across a verse in D&C 45:65 which says in part “gather up your riches that ye may purchase an inheritance” and the print seemed five times the size of the other print and I felt the confirmation that the decision to buy the house was the correct one, which to me is always an amazing process to me.  It amazes me because it is an overwhelming concept that God knows who I am, and can and will answer my individual prayers. It was a great relief to get an answer and to know we were on the right track.  I also learned that there is a scripture that says “go buy a house” and that the scriptures provide the answers to all of the questions of life!

Faith,Lessons Learned

Failures

posted on : March 8, 2018 posted by : Somethingsihavelearned 0 Comment

I have thought a lot about failures and sometimes how crushing they can be.  Sometimes we try and try, and try again and things still don’t go our way, no matter how hard we work, and we wonder why life is so hard or unfair.  One time I was thinking about Joseph Smith, Senior, the father of Joseph Smith the prophet.  He was a farmer who had crop failures after crop failures.  He needed to feed and clothe his family and despite doing his best he kept having his crops fail.  He lost his farms, moved his large family to new locations, started again and failed again.  He finally ended up in Palmyra, New York where he heard the land was rich and the farming good.  He was able to secure some land and start again, in the very place where God needed Joseph Smith, Junior to be.  If his crops and farms had been successful he never would have needed to move.  It seems that our failures, and when we keep on trying in spite of them, lead us along.  We learn from them, become stronger and wiser.  Like Joseph Smith, Senior, hopefully we end up where God wants us to be.